Mugabe's Home Game Bashed Down To Third Spot
50-100 level….4 limpers round to me on the button. I have QQ and raise to 600. SB calls and UTG limper pushes for 2,500. Folded back to me and I figure he has either AK and I’m racing, or AA or KK in which case I’m way behind. I elect to pass since I still have 3,500 chips left. The SB folds and shows 88.
I state I folded QQ and am met by a torrent of abuse from a player who wasn’t even in the hand - let’s call him FB. “If you folded QQ you are a BAD player - you never had QQ”. Of course I can never prove it because there was action behind, but let’s think this through… I can either race it off with AK, or be completely dominated by AA or KK. Otherwise I can keep 3,500 chips and keep playing with a comfortable stack…what would you do?
“Squeeze play innit” continues FB
Well, no in fact. I have already squeezed, you idiot. Let’s assume I have rags and have squeezed to punish the limpers. The SB has already kept me honest, so why would the UTG re-squeeze with rags? Either the small blind or I have something clearly. In fact, to limp push UTG has AA or KK about 80% of the time and AK 10% of the time. Well, that’s in theory - I wouldn’t put it past some of these donuts to limp push with QJ, or indeed 88. I guess some people just can’t put down QQ.
This dialogue is why Gutshot is one of the most despicable places to play on the surface of this planet. It has currently moved up to second, I believe:
- Backstreet crackhouse game, 20a Sa Fonto St, Bogata, Colombia 2) Gutshot, 44-48 Clerkenwell Road, London
- Mugabe’s ZANU-PF home game, 1 St George’s Street, Harare, Zimbabwe
The Gutshot game is populated by several loudmouthed individuals, whose only brain function it seems is to direct a tirade of abuse to their voiceboxes. It’s just noise pollution. I can’t think of many worse places to play your poker. The comps are well structured and hence attractive, but I’d rather be at the dentist.
Anyhow, FB suffers a bad beat and is down to 1,200 in chips - pushing territory.
He then decides to push under the gun at the 100-200 level. He splashes the pot big time, and says:
“Come on, call me, I’m ahead”
Unfotunately, the small cluster of cells in his cranium cannot re-direct their meagre resources quick enough to his hands, and he has left his cards over the betting line and they are promptly hoovered up by the dealer and mucked. He is now playing the board with his all-in, and he bleats for a ruling. The ruling goes in his favour (this is completely incorrect), but he still busts soon after.
As for me, I finish 17th of the 70 runners - not good enough for a payday, but at least I got some felt time.
My exit hand is frankly embarrassing. I am down to 5,000 chips and the big blind is 1,000, so I’m in deep trouble after making three laydowns of A10 to pushes to then be shown Arag or QJ. I push in mid position, but then realise the big stack has raised UTG. As a result I have called an all in with 92 off. He shows A7, so I’ve pretty much got the race I needed to find, but two bullets on the flop seal my fate. I pick up two bounties so am £40 down for the night.
P&L updated tomorrow after the BetterPoker event.